Weekly News UpDate

Another Sunday and another UpDate--The news, the booze and a snooze! Let us jump into the fray!

1--Oh Boy! More rich and disgusting people for Hollywood, the Becks.

2--Last Harry Potter book is out! Does he get killed? How laid?

3--Another NY driving story. A woman leaves a party drunk and gets in her car, boyfriend tries to stop her and she drags him to his death.

4--Pres Bush checks into hospital for a colonoscopy; mthey found and removed 5 polyps; 4 were beign and the 5th was his head.

5--Beyonce while performing in Fla slips and bust her ass, and then ask fans not to put it on youTube, 4 mins later i8t was on youTube.

6--The new member of the "slut pack" lindsay lohan was arrested for DUI and coke. It was not her coke, but it was just in her pocket of her jeans. She goes to rehab--AGAIN?

7--Tour de Farce--sorry--Tour De France is all but dead, there are more drug infractions than Lohan for god sake.

8--This one is my fav of the week--OBESITY is "socially contagious", (thinking........) Does that mean I have to wear one of those little white Mike jackson masks, whenever I am arounf "fat" people?

9--Just in! Dick Cheney goes to hospital for new heart!

Another week of totally worthless sh*t! see you in the funny papers!

CHUQ