The Assie Award

The count is in and we have a winner. May I have a drum roll, please? Have a month of voting, the count is finished and the winner has been determined and my loyal readers I would like to thank for their participation, it is much appreciated.

The first runner up is the statement by No. 6 which was:


6--The last is a statement by Pres Bush. when analyzing the healthcare proposals of the democratic candidates. He said:

"they are trying to FEDERALIZE the health care system". I believe the word he was looking for was "socialize".

And now for the moment we have been building to all evening. And now the winner of the 2007 Assie Award is: (trumpet fan fare)

4--On MSNBC an anthropology professor said while analyzing Sen Craig behavior in an airport restroom said:

"First it is not about gay sex. It is about two men approaching each for man on man sex."


To everyone who voted, I would like to thank you. And I look forward to this year and the idiotic statements made by those we trust to do the right thing.

And The Nominees Are!

Since this blog was started, I have been posting some of the most anal statements made by people in the news. I call it an anal-ocity and now I want to award an "Assie" to the most anal of them all. I will post the nominees here and on a couple of discussion forums and hopeful people will vote on the most anal statement.

And the nominees are!

1--When ordered abck to jail this summer Paris said:

"It's Not Fair"

2--Gen. George Casey said:

"We are not doing nation building in Iraq"

3--Miss South Carolina, when she said"

"I think it is because some in the US do not have access to maps" a youtube moment.

4--On MSNBC an anthropology professor said while analyzing Sen Craig behavior in an airport restroom said:

"First it is not about gay sex. It is about two men approaching each for man on man sex."

5--Fred Thompson's take on why the Sunni tribes turned on Al-Qaeda:

"AQ put into effect an anti-smoking ban".

6--The last is a statement by Pres Bush. when analyzing the healthcare proposals of the democratic candidates. He said:

"they are trying to FEDERALIZE the health care system". I believe the word he was looking for was "socialize".

These are the nominees, please look them over and vote for you fav.

Anal-ocity

I have a new candidate for the anal-ocity award. This one comes from Carl Rove.

recently he stated that, "Congress pushed for the invasion of Iraq and that the President had been against it." These pricks can spin anything.


Remember; I will be posting the list for you guys to vote on. The winner will be given the ASSIE award at the beginning of '08. If anyone has a candidate please send it to me and I will post it here for all to see. you may have a winner!

ANAL-Ocity

Found another anal statement by a world leader. This one is really good.


Israel has vowed not to cause a humanitarian crisis in Gaza - despite plans to cut fuel and electricity in a bid to halt rocket attacks. This one is from the mouth of Israeli PM Olmert.


I wish him luck, he could be the next ASSIE award winner.

Anal-Ocity

They anal statements just keep flowing. Politicians are so pathetic in the speeches. Below is another statement to be considered for the ASSIE award.

arguing that his own real-world experience and socially conservative values represent the "Republican wing of the Republican Party."


I like the republican wing of the republican party, now that is definitely an anal statement.


Look for the complete list of nominees in late Dec 07, I will let my readers decide who gets the ASSIE.

Anal-Ocity

The stupid statements just keep coming, it is a source that just keeps giving, lame ass sayings. This nominee is from our good friend and moral BS supporter, Bill O'reilly. He said this about Carter's criticism of the Bush policies. It seems that Bill watched an interview that Wolf Blitzer has with Carter and now his summation of the show.


"Summing up, that interview was simply awful. President Carter is entitled to his opinion, but history is history, and he has no right to distort it, president or not. CNN has lots of problems. They now have another one."


Ya gotta love a guy that has more mouth than brains. He keeps this up he could be the next "ASSIE" winner.

Anal-Ocity

Yet another really dumb ass statement from the President. Recently, Bush was addressing the bill on health care that he had just vetoed and in explaining himself he said:

"they are trying to FEDERALIZE" the health care system."


Sorry there Bob-o, the word you were looking for was "socialize"

Bush seems to be stacking the anal-ocity deck in his favor. LOL

Anal-Ocity

I have yet another totally anal statement that I will put into the mix for the most anal saying of the year. This one comes from Press Sec. Perino, when asked about the two secret memos on terrorist interrogation. She said:

"It was safe, necessary, lawful and saved American lives".


"....saved American lives". This is the part I liked, I mean would we have accepted that excuse from the North Vietnamese on the torture of McCain and others? Not likely! As I have said before it implies that the people receiving the torture were somehow less human than Americans and therefore it was acceptable to treat they inhumanely.

Look for the complete list on Dec 15 or so. You input is happily accepted.

Anal-Ocity

I have found another anal statement that I will put into the running for the "ASSIE" award that I will give at the end of the year. This one is yet another one from the lips of Pres. Bush.


"Chaos would embolden not only the extremists and radicals who would like to do us harm, but it would also embolden Iran. What you don't want is to have a nuclear arms race taking place in the Middle East."


He still says that if we leave Iraq it will embolden Iran. You have to love this guy, he can say the dumbest things and mean them. I would say that the invasion has done more to embolden Iran than leaving would. I am not alone in this belief.

Your thoughts?

Anal-Ocity

And yet another candidate for the ASSIE AWARD!

How can rational people make these types of statements? OOPS! SORRY! That would be assuming they are rational. Silly me!

Newly announced presidential candidate, Fred Thompson, has given his lean on the reason that the Sunni tribes are now allied with the US.

SIOUX CITY, Iowa - Freshly minted GOP White House hopeful Fred Thompson puzzled Iowans yesterday by insisting an Al Qaeda smoking ban was one reason freedom-loving Iraqis bolted to the U.S. side.

"They said, 'You gotta quit smoking,'" Thompson explained to a questioner asking about progress in Iraq during a town hall-style meeting.

As I have said in the past, "I CANNOT MAKE THIS SH*T UP!" I love my job!

What Is Gay Sex?

This will be my last entry on the Sen. Craig thing.

MSNBC had an anthropology professor on as an expert , when asked to try and explain what was going on with Craig in the airport, he said,

"First it is not about gay sex. It is about two men approaching each other for man on man sex."

thinking....thinking.....I got nothing! Apparently I need to do more research because I have missed something.


This will also be added to the nominees for the most anal statement and will be entered into the mix for the ASSIE AWARD.


NOTE: There is a wealth of stupid statements coming out of the mouths of Americans. They are making my dream of giving an Anal-ocity award, the Assie, to the most stupid a dream come true. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Anal-ocity

Another anal and completely stupid statement, already. They just keeping rolling. There will be a wealth of dumbass stuff to vote on in Jen 08.

This is the newest one, it comes from Iraqi PM Maliki.

BAGHDAD - Iraq's embattled prime minister defended his government Sunday against American critics, saying they underestimate the problems facing this country and fail to appreciate his achievements "such as stopping the civil and sectarian war."


He has stopped civil and sectarian war? Did I miss something while I was sleeping?

Anal-ocity

I have found another candidate for the ASSIE AWARD to be given by me every year. This quote is from the Miss Teen Pageant from the the young lady representing South Carolina.

When asked why some in the US do not have much knowledge of geography, her answer was:

"Personally I believe that it is because that in the USA some do not have access to maps".

First of all, I did realize there was a shortage of maps. Second, she is 17 yrs old and that would make her a product of the Bush education policies. "Nuff said?


Please feel free to to add to the list of anal statements made by people--your input will be greatly appreciated.

Anal-Ocity

I have another nomminee for the Anal-ocity award. You know the dumbest, most anal and the big piece of crap that any can utter.


Mr. McConnell's letter, however, said the government will police itself and has measures in place to prevent snooping on U.S. citizens.


Director of National Intelligence, Michael McConnell's comments on the new spy bill just passed by Congress.



GOD! I love these guys and none seem to realize just how stupid their comments are.

ANAL-ocity

I have another statement that I would like to put into the run for the most ANAL statement of the year.

It comes from my boy MITT!

" Romney told a crowd gathered at a golf course. "America is not happy with how the war in Iraq is going, and is angry. But America is not about to take a sharp left turn and put somebody in the White House who would turn America into a European-type state."

Mitt sure knows his stuff, huh?


CHUQ

Anal-ocity

Well it is time again for the most anal comment to be entered into the mix.


The word was 'we don't do nation-building,'" Gen. George Casey, the Army's chief of staff,


OK, then what would you call the rebuilding of Iraq, the attempted rebuilding of Iraq, in the image of the US?

ANAL-ocity

Yet another quote to be in the running for the dumbest BS you have ever heard.

O'Reilly explained. "CNN and especially MSNBC delight in showing Iraqi violence because they want Americans to think badly of President Bush, and that strategy has succeeded."


Hurry and include your fav bullsh*t statement.

Another anal-ocity

If you remember I started this section to find the most assinine or anal statement, to be considered for an award at the end of the year. Please submit any statement or quote that you think would be anal.

The one I chose for this week comes from the court proceedings of one Paris Hilton. I am sure that everyone knows what has transpired in the last week, if not please send address for I will move there tomorrow.

When order back to jail in her last court appearance she threw a tantrum and yelled.

"IT'S NOT FAIR!"


Not fair? If she was searching for sympathy, may I suggest she go to a Webster's--she will find sympathy --between Shit and Syphillis! Enough said? I think so!

CHUQ

Weekly Anal-ocity

This will be another feature --the most anal bullshit coming from the mouths of politicians.

WASHINGTON, May 25 — The Bush administration is developing what are described as concepts for reducing American combat forces in Iraq by as much as half next year, according to senior administration officials in the midst of the internal debate.

What happened to they will follow us back here if we leave? Would that mean the terrorist won? I am still working on the veto of a bill that would start bringing the troops home.

But wait there is more! Gen Pace when asked about the increase of violence and death in and around Baghdad, said he could understand why the increase.

Let's see an occupying force that is becoming extremely unpopular and will not go away and you cannot understand why the increase. Ok I have had enough!

Damn! What an anal bunch of f*cks!

CHUQ